My Boss is an awful bully and human being

by Chase
(USA)

My boss is an awful human being. He only cares about himself, not his employees who make the money for him. For the *removed* Dept, he cut 25% of their salary off four years ago and hasn't given it back since. My side, the *removed* dept., we haven't had a raise in 6 years, no Union contract for 4 years and possibly paid off our Union rep not to come around anymore.


He is rude, pushy, verbally abusive, two-faced, very stressful, and constantly yells. I've had many confrontations with in 10 years I have been working there but it reached the boiling point...So this past Friday morning, I walked in calmly and politely and asked my boss to talk to him in private into his office. I kindly asked him to lay me off after 10 years.

The reason why is I am not well and unhappy. I am sick mentally and physically. After being ten years at my job, I had to deal with constant verbal abuse by the boss, by salesmen, art director and production manger. I am forced to do other work besides being a production artist which I was hired to do. I'm forced to be customer service for the salesmen, run around do errands, and get harassed by clients as well.

It's a toxic environment where everyone is miserable, mostly because the boss doesn't care about anyone but himself. It has taken a toll on me. I am stressed out, I constantly get sick, I have very high blood pressure, battling depression, and now I have pneumonia for 3 weeks now, going on 4.

I went back to work this past Thursday after being out two days for pneumonia where I should have stayed home for a week, instead I wanted to work. I had 13 jobs on my desk to do all day. So around 2pm came, I had 2 jobs left to do for the day, I was in the middle of my third. So I pop online to check my email real quick, it could have been 10 minutes tops. The boss, who's literally 5 steps away, send me an email telling me to slow down on the internet all day because we have a lot of work.

That's total *bleep* because there was only 7 jobs behind me on a table which can be split up between 4 other employees. I wrote back to him saying you should be happy I came in today in my sick condition.

That morning I gave him the doctor's note saying I have pneumonia, he's heard me constantly coughing and hacking up a lung. I even gave him the medication I'm taking. I told him I should be home for the week. He didn't want to hear it!

He accused me of not working, when he has said many times I'm his best go to guy. So I got my things and left for the day.

So back to Friday morning...I asked kindly to be laid off. He starts right out yelling at me like I'm trash, he says I made you sick... so I said you know what yeah, you and this company has after 10 years. I'm sick, depressed, stressed out, and I need to get better. I said this calmly.

He continued to yell at me saying what did I mean by that email... I said it's exactly what I said, you should be happy I came in while being seriously sick. I said how dare you accuse me of not working when all I do is work and get jobs done at least 5 days before the deadline!

Then he goes, you know what, I'm not laying you off, and yells at me, you're quitting!! I said I'm not quitting, I'm not a quitter. Then he yells at me, get the *bleep* out of my office. I stand up and say no. Then he proceeds to leave his office like a punk and yells at me get the *bleep* out of my office!

Then I started to get a little heated, and ask am I fired now?? am I fired now?? He continues to yell at me to get the *bleep* out of here, and I ask am I fired?? Then he's still yelling at the top of his lungs saying I'm a *bleep*, oh you saying no one does work around but you right?

Then I defended myself yelling back at him. Yes! Yes I do, I do most of the work around, I'm the one who makes you the money! You treat your best worker like this after 10 years right?? He charges at me yelling with his fist in front of him get the *bleep* out of my office! I asked again am I fired?? He says what the *bleep* are you deaf? SO I said you know what go *bleep* yourself you piece of *bleep*!

Then he calmed down started stepping back and said that's my boy as he crawled away into the department. Then I walked out. The whole office heard it, his best friend who works there saw the whole thing go down. I walked out and saw the production manager was chuckling, I didn't know what to make of that.

A couple of hours later a co-worker called me up saying he saw what happened and was proud of me. A lot of the guys heard what went down and was happy. So now I wait to go back to work Monday and to see what happens because I was never told I was fired or laid off and I never said I quit.

I feel like George Costanza now where in that episode he goes back to work on Monday after he berated his boss and quit. I started looking for a new job and tried to get in touch with my Union to seek help.

Anyone else have it as bad as I do? Anyone have advice?

Comments for My Boss is an awful bully and human being

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Phew!
by: Jill R.

Wow... you sure did put my curse word editor to the test ;)

But all kidding aside, I know how you feel! A lot of us do because we've been there... and it's just not worth it.

Jobs aren't as easy to come by these days, though, so it's extremely important to learn how to manage those detrimental feelings. It's more than possible to learn how to be happy regardless of what others do.

What I've learned is that there are more bosses out there like this than many even imagine... and when the grass isn't greener on the other side, the only thing you can rely on is yourself.

Find ways to RELAX! Find ways to enjoy and take serious advantage of any time away from work. Leave it there... and cut yourself some slack.

I wish you the best... I know how it feels... but I'm also proof that with a serious commitment to yourself, you can keep a bad job and still be happy (while you look for something else if necessary).

Keep us updated.... George :)

(sorry, that really made me laugh, even if you weren't trying to be funny... it was great!).

Jill R.
OurStressfulLives.com

P.S.

I suggest you check out this page...

http://www.ourstressfullives.com/causes-of-stress.html

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Thank you!
by: Chase

Hi and thanks for the advice...It's been a really tough few weeks for me and I'm nervous about what's going to happen Monday. I have no idea what that man will say and do next with me. Also, Sorry about the language! I just wanted to be honest as possible to show everyone hw it went down.

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hang in there
by: Anonymous

Hi, I am completely disgusted by this creep who is attacking you. You did right to both yell back and not quit.
this is a sick individual. intensify your job search and do not quit. you may qualify for unemployment benefits.

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Sick of the lies he wants me to tell
by: notahappycamper

My boss came to me today and asked if anyone comes to you asking questions abt anything to do with our dept he and another manager must be present. I am sick of him and wish they would find someone else to run the dept. It is very stressful to deal with this day in and day out. When I go to work I am very tensed each day. I am thinking of going to HR to ask that I be removed from his dept. What's you take on this?

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On you side...NOT!
by: Anonymous

Do you know that Human Resource is always on the boss side? Who pays their salaries huh? The department title sure sounds like it was for humanity but don't be fool, all they do is collect your accusations of you boss, pass it on to your boss so they have answers! Unless it is a sexual harassment lawsuits, company would rather listen to your boss than you..since you are replaceable(at least more than your boss). I work in an Information Technology department. The director had fired 8 people since he was hired at the beginning of 2008! He was abusive and extremely moody(slams doors, throw things, screaming in his office), he acts like a little kid without parents, he basically behaved however he wanted because no one would dare challenge him. And those few who did complained to HR, are now ex employees!

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Awful bully
by: Anonymous

can't you go to Labor Relations I after working 12 years at a school the food director wants to transfer me to another school to do the same job i did at the school i love and i refused got a medical because i'm stressed out have anxieties and depressed all from him and there is no union so i know how you feel all i have been doing is crying because i loved where i worked hope everything works for you.

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Update
by: Chase

Well I have been unemployed since July. I was suspended from work then I was fired 4 weeks later without even being notified. I found out through the unemployment office. From that point on I had to fight for my unemployment insurance. I also went to the NLRB and they didn't help me, they sided with my Union. My Union basically said I wasn't worth fighting for. For 10 1/2 years I paid my union dues and I wasn't worth helping at all. I'm glad to be gone from that place. I'm happier than I ever was, I have no stress anymore and I'm still continuing to look for employment and I've been thinking of going freelance full time.

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Help
by: Anonymous

I have worked for a doctor for 11 years. When I first started (for the first 12 months) she was wonderful. Now, my life here is hell. I follow through with the rules that we have always done, but now she isnt happy with them, she yells at me in front of patients. If something isnt done the way she wants (and how she wants things changes every 60 seconds or so) she breaks pens, throws things, slams down phones, yells, screams anything else you can imagine. She counsels people who are suffering from work place bullying but wont see that she is bullying herself.

I have been here and set up work place rules with her for 11 years. I have made her money, saved her money, saved her from a legal case and been an extremely good employee.

At the end of last year I had a break down, I wasnt allowed to work for amonth (my doctor NOT my boss said this). My boss refused to believe it had anything to do with work, she said it was because my husband was unemployed. Yes, he is unemployed, but that is not the problem, although it is the reason I stay in this job.

I now have no confidence, I want to cry the whole time I am at work, I dont sleep because I am worried about the next day, I am on anti depressants and sometimes having suicidal thoughts. Where can I go for help? I am not under a union or anything, there is no work place agreement, there was not even a job description when I started here. It is a single doctor practice with just me running the clinic. HELP PLEASE

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Insubordination
by: Anonymous

The original poster is very brave for standing up to his boss. The only problem I see with this is that the boss can fire someone for insubordination after doing that and attempt to deny their unemployment benefits. I have a boss like that myself, but I'm on a PIP right now and will hopefully be let go in 2 weeks, otherwise I am either going to try for disability or quit and appeal to the Department of Labor to get UE anyway due to having to quit because of a hostile work environment.

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Bosses
by: Anonymous

Well done! (original post). I wish I was as brave as you.

I really feel for the poster in the clinic, I do know what it feels like to be so depressed about your job that it makes you suicidal and sick. I used to work in aplace where I was badly bullied and ended up off with depression for a month as my manager didn't help me and then I quit.

To the poster slamming HR people, please get your facts right. I'm sorry to hear about your experience, but please do not generalize. I am a HR officer and I can assure you, you are so wrong. We spend all our time trying to help employees and we are the first line of fire for the big bosses, who constantly drive us up the wall with their hellish demands and insane policies. We get all the stick when we have to communicate unpopular decisions and employees never see how much we fight them in their behalf behind the scenes, and pretty much always we are just as badly affected by things AND we have to put up with people blaming us for management decisions we don't even agree with.

My direct boss is lovely but our director is a psychopath intent in destroying all of our lives cos his own sucks. Her and me spend our days picking up the pieces of the mess he causes everywhere he turns his very unwanted attention to. But the guy owns the place and is nuts and we can't fight him any more.



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To Anonymous
by: Anonymous

I'm sorry to say that many people have had terrible problems with HR siding with bully bosses, myself included. Nothing is EVER done about this person who bullied me out of my job (and made me ill as well) and she has had plenty of complaints. HR also went along with her with putting me on a bogus PIP. It's unfortunate, but most people I have spoken to also believe HR always sides with management.

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I feel for you! :(
by: Kevin

I know how you feel! I am 26 years old currently and I work for a unionized job currently until I become a mainstream rapper, even though no one would probably give a hoot. I hate my bosses too because they yelled at me for the fact that I didn't do the trash quick enough and they stole the trash key from me anyway, so I couldn't anyway, let alone did they alert me that they set the alarm off, the bastards! I wouldn't care if I got fired though cuz I hate that job and I hate money and making rich people richer when they don't deserve to be rich in the first place! I also hate that there's no female porters that they had hired to do the job with me and my department head always complains about his own job to one of the produce heads..They all have a bathroom mentality there.. But and one time, I accidentally left my lunch bag with a book of mine in it on one of the cardboard bales, since I am a porter and I bale cardboard in a carboard baler machine and take out trash. Well I left the lunch bag there, neglected to mention "Wait, my lunch bag is on there" and it went to the bale warehouse and I told the higher ups and they didn't give a flying hoot, just told me a reminder of their stupid store policy for safekeeping of valuables! The announcements they make there are also stupid, but I just try to not give a hoot what the managers think of me, but yes, I do suffer from things like IBS-C, a bloated face, acid reflux disease, hypotonia, asperger's syndrome, add, etc. and mentally I wanna beat someone up or strangle them to death, but I try to calm myself down and that sometimes works for me....Once I almost had a heart attack in there..I had to rest for 15 mins.

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Overly bearing boss
by: Ms x

I agree. I had a demanding boss who said i am slow although i delivered the results and meet the budget. He always does not read his emails and accuse me of not working on matters. He refuse to listen that we had tight resource and said i threatened him when i told him the problems. I had enough of this and decided to end it once and for all. He can have hell for all i care

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Proud of you Chase!
by: Standing Tall :)

So proud of Chase for standing up to your boss like that! A lot of us lack the courage to do that, well done :)

I once knew a lady like that, who owned her own company, a spa provider of ancient secrets, who was also very verbally abusive of her employees. She treated her previous employee, who was a very lovely hard worker, like shit, insulting the employee's intellect, flying off the handle and raising her voice all the time. She refused to properly deal w/ the issues that were causing the problem and instead reacted to the problem in a very negative way. It was a very unfortunate situation; however I believe that employee found the courage to leave and is in a much happier situation now.

WELL DONE for not letting an angry awful human being bully you around at work! Remember we work to live-- not the other way around, and as the old saying goes, "when I'm old, it's not my boss who'll be there for me, but my friends and family". Proud of you!

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3 years later
by: Chase

It's been around 3 years this exact time and I've never been happier. I'm a freelance artist now working with some major well known companies and I get to meet celebrities as well. It was tough in the beginning when I left my job but it was the right decision. Don't let anyone bully you and don't let your jobs make you miserable. You have one life to live and everyone deserves respect and to be happy.

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Congratulations Chase
by: Merveilles

Well done Chase!

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