The Story of Dick

by R
(USA)

This is the account of the worst human being alive! Nothing below is drawn up or exaggerated. These are all real evil deeds of a real evil man. I hope that you have some funny comments or can share some horrible stories. Enjoy my misery!!!


For the past three years "Dick", the head of my department, has demeaned me with every chance he gets. He once had a secretary call me and request that I come to a conference room to "help" carry documents back up to his office. When I arrived, Dick waved to me from the elevator empty handed. He regularly walks over to my cube to ask me to print something out for him. In that time he could have walked to the printer himself. Quite often in front of my colleagues, Dick will inform me that I am to help him clean off his desk. He has publicly embarrassed me by referring to me as his administrative assistant when I am a senior level accountant and the fastest advancing employee in the history of the department. One day after I printed out 70 copies of 50 page tax returns (that I compiled mind you!) for his meeting, Dick went out to lunch and brought me back his leftovers as a thank you. When I told him how despicably disrespectful that was, he said, "You're too sensitive." Every year he has asks me to calculate the bonus threshold for all the executives of the entire company. I make less than 6Ok annually and do not bonus.

When in meetings Dick talks to me like I'm a dog. My last meeting he patted on the chair and said, "Sit!" When I said, "I am not a dog. Do not speak to me that way." He told me on the way back that I have a real attitude problem that needs adjusting. Oh and this meeting was basically introductions for farming me out to another department on a temporary assignment. I didn't receive any kickbacks for the weeks of extra work. In my presence, Dick informed the manager that he was doing this to save on labor.

Once during a meeting Dick noticed me working with a pretty young girl. As a result he sent me to search the entire building for our IT Technician in order to get Internet access in the conference room. He informed me, and everyone else, that he would steal my chair before I returned. Before I left upon my quest, I told him to take it because she and I were finished, and that I would be returning to my desk. He replied, "I have you booked for the entire day. You will sit here in silence if you are done." I returned and sat there staring at him for 20 minutes. After growing tired of the discomfort, he asked the pretty girl if she was finished working with me and then said, "You are dismissed." I went into his office afterwords and told him how shocked and appalled I was at this humiliation. He told me as he arrogantly chuckled, "You are young so I may as well tell you this now. The boss always wins. Choose your battles carefully."

Above all else, he has put his hand on my leg on two separate occasions. The first time it happened immediately after complimenting my "muscular physique" as I bent over to pick something up. I sat down next to him in order continue reviewing his my work, and the next thing I know his hand was on my thigh. I knocked his hand off and made no mention as I was way too freaked out. The second time, it just so happened to land on my thigh again. I said, "DUDE! WUD-A-YA DOIN'?" He replied, "Oh that. It was an accident. Come on! You know I'm not gay. Don't get so freaked out." I've since considered using this as leverage, but think I have passed my statute of limitations since the first incident was in 2009 and the second in 2010.

I have stood my ground on countless occasions, and just said "no" so much, that sometimes I question whether or not I'm being uncooperative...and I shouldn't! When this happens, more often than not he will take a step back and come up with some other way to demean me in the next few days. He is clever too. He'll word it in a way that sounds somewhat reasonable, but then I have to remember that this is what makes him tick.

I don't share this feeling sorry myself. I have a bright future ahead of me, a beautiful girlfriend, good looks, and good health. In all honesty, I feel sorry for what he needs to do in order to justify his miserable existence. I pity him...but that doesn't mean I wouldn't jump on the opportunity to have him canned! The effin' bum!

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Jaded
by: Tracy

Just read your new post. Maybe I'm jaded but (apart from the leftovers... which is kind of funny... and the leg on thigh... which is not at all funny) this doesn't sound too bad.

Almost every boss I've ever had has asked me to do stupid tasks that they could have done... make copies, type their emails, take out the trash... stuff that wasn't "my" job. But then again, they paid my salary. If they want to pay me $60k (or hell, even $40k) per year to make copies and sit quietly in a meeting I'll gladly accept!

And every payroll and accounting person I've ever known has had to sit around and cut big payroll checks and big bonuses for others while they make very little (sometimes only $12 an hour). That does come with the territory.

However, as I said, the thigh touching is way beyond acceptable. I can see how things like that can make all the rest seem even worse than it is.

Congratulations on having a good paying job though! Maybe I'm just jaded from having too many bad bosses, but it seems like most are that way so I happily take what I can get these days and just let go of the little things (like making copies and taking out the trash... and no, I'm not the janitor). I also know too many people out of jobs and struggling so that also makes me a bit more willing to overlook things as long as I have a reliable job (and my boss doesn't touch my thigh!).

I do hope it gets better for you though.

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I understand
by: Anonymous

I do think it is hard to feel appreciated and enjoy your job when your boss isn't giving your the respect you feel like you deserve.

I do know it is hard to be treated like an assistant when your not.

Everyone has their own breaking point. I understand how you feel.

It probably won't get better. It usually gets worse. So I hope you can either find a better job or stop letting it bother you.

although if some dude touched my thigh I would freak out. That would be MY breaking point.

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what is normal?
by: Anonymous

Haha at the first comment. Apart from the thigh touching the rest actually seems pretty normal except I get paid a lot less to have to put up with it!

is it weird that I think of all of that as normal?

Okay but seriously I do feel bad that you are going through this. I hope it gets better. It sounds like you are a talented professional and he doesn't deserve you.

Hang in there!!!

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Thanks for the feedback everyone!!!!
by: Anonymous

The truth is that I find myself annoyed at the tasks because I am singled out. Had this been the norm for my other colleagues in my position I wouldn't have such a problem with it. He asks me to do things he would not even ask the people below me to do. He asks me to do things he would not ask the secretaries to do. I've done my time of shoveling the crap to move ahead. I am 2 sections away from passing my CPA; a feat in which no one in my office, other than him, has accomplished. Yet I'm treated like the bottom of the barrel. And the other thing that really got me was the leftover lunch. Who in their right mind says thank you by giving leftovers that you bit into lol? Did you ever see Shawshank Redemption? I thought of the warden handing Andy the cherry pie lol. It is not the worst environment ever, but for some reason he looks to play a cruel game with me for no reason other than the fact that he can get away with it. Karma is a b*tch though :)

For those of you unemployed, I'm sorry that you have to hear my complain about my job when you don't have one. I wish you well in your search for employment search. I hope you all have happy holidays and thank you for reading my story. I hope you got a kick out of it.

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Envy
by: Anonymous

I wonder if he's threatened by your success.

Getting a CPA is a big deal. It could be intimidating him.... maybe he's trying to use tactics to make you feel as if you aren't valuable... so that you won't try to do better by moving up or getting another job.

I've noticed that sometimes bosses treat their most valuable employees the worst to destroy self-esteem to ensure that they don't think they can do any better. This keeps them in the same job, doing the same good job that the boss likes them doing.

It's a really screwed up way of thinking, but I've seen it happen!

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Half a Mars Bar
by: Not from Mars

Reading the bit about giving you left-overs reminded me of my despicable boss, who went on holiday and come back with a delectable gift for us working minions - half a Mars Bar each.

This puts cheap into a whole new category!

All the best!

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Nice
by: Anonymous

Really impressive post. I read it whole and going to share it with my social circules. I enjoyed your article and planning to rewrite it on my own blog.
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You threaten him! NEW
by: Tony

I congratulate you on the dignified and articulate way you told your story. I would guess this person feels threatened by you. However the first thing to understand is that when you are dealing with a prat usually everyone else around him also thinks he's a prat. Make cautious enquiries - you'll probably find a lot of allies.

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